i got news from AAPM that i'm a finalist for the John R. Cameron Early-Career Investigator Symposium. i never even took the time to be grateful and happy, my brain immediately went to worries and concerns about how i can win the award, so i can get an o1 visa in the future. i can't imagine what it's like to stand on stage to present about my research. but i'm feeling more excited than nervous now. right now i'm nore focused on how i can win. if i want to pursue a PhD, i have to win this.